I fall in love with my exes. I remember the first time it happened. In high school I was dating a boy named Jose. A boy who had pursued and won me. But being his girlfriend wasn't nearly as fun as being his desired. And so I "broke up with him", but not really, just as a thing, a new experience for us, a different phase of our relationship. But he didn't see it that way, the new phase way, he just saw it as over. I pined for him for three years.

I prefer my break-ups to be break-free. I'll bend but I don't want to hear a snap. I like to keep hanging out in a vague and flirtatious way that suggests a reconciliation at any moment. Even if ending it was my idea and is better for both of us.

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