Last night I slept lightly, listening for the rustle of Josh's bags and the sound of Soupy's toenails on the stairs. He was leaving this morning and I didn't want to miss his departure. We shared coffee and eggs, he packed, I did the dishes. I still had my apron and pink gloves on when he said good-bye. It was barely light out. Today I walked Bello in the park. Just like Josh and I did yesterday. Only today it wasn't quite as enjoyable. Bello seemed farther behind, the kids seemed louder and, well, Josh wasn't there. Josh is always Josh and that is a great comfort to me. At the grocery store he always buys corn tortillas and cheese. He prefers tin cups. And then there is the shape of his back bent over a bicycle... He is so familiar I can barely see him anymore! But I do, I see him everywhere. I see the outline of where he used to be.

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