Luke asked me if I thought it was possible for two people to be alone in a relationship. At 37, no I don't think so. I am always comparing, referring, reacting to my past. Even if I don't realize it. Yes, Luke and I are sitting alone at the dinner table. But we are not here, with each other, by accident. If your first love becomes your heart's barometer for what love is, then you are always working from this point. My choice to share company with Luke is in part because he is already familiar to my heart. He has home in him. And so did Kenya. And Adam. And Sarah.

I think I am out here creating a whole new life but maybe I'm just seeking out and finding comfort in what I already know.